At that moment, my heart ached. Love, it's strange that Cesar talks about love.
"Idiot. You don't even know what love is."
But Cesar was completely unfazed by my harsh words, he smiled discreetly and replied.
“I know.”
“So, what is love?”
He slowly caressed my cheek.
“Love means liking someone very, very much.”
At that moment, old memories rushed back. I remember this saying clearly. Because that's what I told Cesar when I read him fairy tales.
Cesar looked at me again, squinted his eyes, smiled and added.
“Even very, very much.”
The corners of his eyes had graceful wrinkles. Looking at that smile, I suddenly felt my chest tighten and my nose sting.
“……What, what is that.”
My heart beat so hard that I unconsciously held my breath. My face was hot.
“Ren said it was love.”
“……”
I choked up, unable to speak.
It was just something I said casually, but Cesar remembered it all, without missing a word. My existence in his world is so great. I vaguely understand that.
Until now, has anyone ever taken me so seriously? I do not know. Will anyone care about me like that in the future? Even if I try to think, I can't remember.
He was blind, only looking at me, saying he loved me.
“Ren, every time I look at Ren, this part of me hurts.”
He pointed to his chest.
“Really, really?”
I tried to act normal.
“Yeah, and sometimes when I look at Ren, I feel like I'm about to cry.”
“That thing is……”
I can't believe Cesar said he was about to cry. Why did he feel like crying?
“Is it the same now?”
I gently stroked the corner of his eye, thinking maybe he was in pain somewhere. But the corners of Cesar's eyes were dry. At that time, Cesar gently held my hand.
“Now then……”
While speaking, he shook his head. His face looked so lonely that I couldn't say anything.
“Cesar.”
When I called his name, he slowly approached me. His shadow covered my face, making the surrounding dark. In that darkness, Cesar's red eyes emitted a dim light. I felt a kind of desire from those eyes.
His breathing became increasingly rapid. I felt hot breath, and not long after, I felt the touch of warm, even hot lips.
“Ah.”
I unconsciously let out a cry. His tongue slid between my naturally parted lips, tickling my mouth. At first, that mass of flesh cautiously explored every corner, but gradually moved more roughly. The sound of teeth colliding and the weight of bodies pressing against each other was too obvious.
“Ce, Cesar……”
I was afraid to call his name. I felt scared when I looked straight into his eyes. My whole body had goosebumps, and at the same time my heart was beating wildly, like it was about to burst, making me feel uncomfortable.
“Ha, ugh.”
Cesar, who had been climbing on top of me, looked down at me and said.
“Ren cannot move.”
Faced with that absurd statement, I asked again in bewilderment.
"Huh?"
“Because the husband has to do everything.”
Then Cesar pressed my hands down, restrained me, and slowly brought his lips to my neck. When the warm breath touched it, I accidentally let out a shrill scream.
“Ugh!”
“The book says not to speak up…”
He purred against my neck. The feeling of vibrations on my skin, the warm breath coming in and out gave me goosebumps all over my body. On the contrary, his body temperature was as hot as a hot iron bar.
“Uh…… huh.”
I don't know why I'm sobbing. My body is abnormal. Wherever Cesar's hand touched, heat accumulated, and it was not easy to endure that heat that I had never experienced before.
“Shh, quiet.”
Cesar put his index finger on my lips. Was he really going to do exactly what he read in the book? So what's the next step? Apparently I went through that upbringing too, but no matter how hard I tried to remember, I couldn't remember the next step.
At that time, Cesar whispered in my ear. This time it was a somewhat decisive and stern voice.
“The book says if the wife doesn't listen, she must be punished.”
“Uh, huh?”
At the scary word, my body shrank back. Cesar still kept a very serious expression, he thought for a long time. Him
Um
raised his voice and spoke.
“……But I don't want Ren to get hurt.”
Hearing those words, I involuntarily breathed a sigh of relief, my body relaxed and I chuckled. Cesar quickly stopped me.
"Ah, don't laugh. The book says..."
“Don't show emotions or get distracted, right?”
He again
Um
exclaimed, frowned and nodded. Cesar stared at me for a long moment, then after a moment of hesitation, he kissed my cheek.
“But I like it when Ren smiles.”
“What, what is that.”
Of course, smiling is better than grimacing, but words
like when I smile
made my cheeks hot for no reason. But his next sentence made me even more confused.
“But I also like it when Ren cries.”
"What?"
He gently caressed the corner of my eye.
“When you cry like this, it smells good.”
“What, what… is that.”
I couldn't help but be confused. I understand that he likes me to laugh, but he likes me to cry. I was confused, not knowing how to continue this conversation.
Ignoring me, Cesar still buried his nose in my hair, busy sniffing.
“The smell of dampness. The smell of salt. And the smell of Ren.”
"Huh?"
“Now it smells of confusion.”
I wanted to ask if that smell was there, but for some reason I couldn't open my mouth.
Furthermore, my body was still stuck to Cesar, unable to move.
“Ah, I know, now stop……”
I slowly moved my body, protesting, but he had no intention of moving away at all.
“But don't move.”
“Eh, yeah.”
For some reason, I was overwhelmed by Cesar's strength, so I had to answer like that.
“Next, um……”
Cesar slowly touched my cheek as if reviewing something.
“The book is right
cuddling
.”
“Uh, oh……”
Suddenly that word came out of Cesar's mouth, making my cheeks burn like they were about to explode. But at that moment, Cesar suddenly stopped and asked me.
“But
cuddling
What is it?
How should I receive that question so pure that it brings tears to my eyes?
“I, I don't know either……”
Heat rushed to my cheeks, now I felt dizzy from the heat. If people can die from shame, then the person who will become the corpse in this room tonight is me.
Poor prince concubine Irenea Flores died here because she could not bear the humiliation.
That sentence will be engraved on my tombstone.
I didn't know what to do anymore, so I closed my eyes tightly. But as if this were natural, Cesar's lips touched the corner of my eye.
What, does Cesar actually know everything?
As soon as that doubt appeared, his lips moved to my cheek. He kissed the left cheek once, the right cheek once, as usual.
Then, the action came like a flood, not giving me time to breathe. His lips moved down to my chin, opened slightly and gently bit my neck. My body reflexively contracted due to the natural fear built up from previous bites and bleeding. But he immediately licked the old wound as if apologizing for biting.
“Ha, uh……”
The wet feeling from the tip of that tongue creates an indescribable sensation. I'm constantly having trouble breathing. Not just me. Cesar's breathing also became more rapid than before.
It feels like fire is burning inside my body. These flames keep piling up, stimulating somewhere.
"Lace."
Cesar just called my name, but a gentle creepy feeling ran from my ear to my cheek. His right hand slowly slid into my hair. It was just a normal action like any other day, but I kept panting and moaning.
“Ah, uh. Huh……”
Cesar's eyes were completely fixed on me. Those eyes seemed to be fixed on me, with no intention of distraction.
What to do? Can we……
In fact, doing as Richard said was probably the best thing to do. We are originally husband and wife, so this should have been done on the wedding night. Thinking in a way, we were just doing something natural…….