# 58
At that moment, I realized Dyaren.
Although she finds herself forced to follow the path of the priesthood, her life as a priestess has been rather comfortable.
Even if there are some points of dissatisfaction, not all people in the world are satisfied with their lives.
She was fairly content and life was comfortable.
Don't be insulted wherever you go.
On the contrary, the people's gazes were filled with even more warmth and respect than their gazes towards the nobles.
Since it also possessed holy power, was there a more perfect combination than that?
"the reason."
"the reason?"
Deyarin was confident in the answer she had come up with.
“Yes. I have no reason to leave the life of a priestess. I love being a priestess. So, there must be a strong reason if I have to leave the life of a priestess.”
“……”
Sirius couldn't say he'd find a compelling reason to leave Derain for the life of a priestess.
It was something to be created, not found.
Dearyn, who closed Sirius' mouth, smiled inwardly.
Anyway, she won.
Even in rank dogfights, it felt good to win.
“But why were people on the road playing musical instruments?”
“Ah, these are called street performers... Listening to music makes people feel happy and encourages them.”
“?”
“…It's usually like that. So, as you saw, Sirius was dancing to the beat. When people do that, they feel happy.”
“Hmm...”
When he danced with those who gave him money, he didn't think anything about it.
But when he took Deyaren's hand and turned with her, the sound of his heart was in harmony with Deyaren's looks.
When his legs moved at the same time without saying “one, two, three,” he felt joy rising in his chest.
“I feel happy...”
This was what it meant to be happy.
Sirius looked at Dearyn.
However, he felt happy even without dancing.
“I feel happy when I am with Dyaren.”
It was simply that he felt comfortable around Dyaren.
Just that was all.
“……”
But Dayarin wasn't just that.
'Did I teach him to talk unnecessarily?'
Should I read him fewer books?
No, maybe the book choices were inappropriate.
Or maybe I showed him the world wrong.
Dayarin was overwhelmed with various feelings of remorse.
What exactly am I raising now?
I've been trying to make him noble, but why does he seem to turn so frivolous?
Has it gotten worse now that he's plundering all the women in the world?
Dearyn quickly shook her head and continued walking.
I was now out of the streets that were immersed in the festival atmosphere.
They decided to walk home.
There was nothing urgent, so they could enjoy the walk in comfort.
On the way, it was good that Sirius was discovering new things for the first time.
"What is this?"
“This is stored water to be used if streetlights catch fire.”
“And this?”
"…What is this?"
The world was wide, and sometimes there were things that Deyarin didn't know.
Dearyn approached the object that Sirius had pointed to and began to examine it carefully.
There was a piece of cloth taped to the wall, and what looked like a map had been drawn on it.
Deyarin noticed something written or drawn, so she started touching the fabric here and there, examining it carefully.
Then suddenly I realized.
."? Ah! Ah, yes! That's it!"
She didn't know anything about this in the temple.
“This is him. The one who made the cloth marked his house.”
“?”
“It's an advertisement. If you like this piece of fabric, it invites you to visit the house where it was painted.”
"Yes…."
Not all people in the world know how to read and write.
Among the common people, there are many who die without learning to write their names in their entire lives.
But Dearyn was born a noble and lived as a priestess, making it compulsory for her to learn to read and write.
She lived in a completely different world from these people.
Although priests live among the people, there is always an invisible distinction.
There may also be an unseen difference between Deyarin and Ceres.
He's from a different world.
Even if Ceres wanted very much, the worlds could not mingle.
“If people don’t make this known, no one will know who made the cloth, and so they won’t be able to attribute the work to him.”
Deyarin removed her hand from the cloth and continued the explanation.
"Advertising. It's to tell others."
"Yes, right. Oh, by the way, just because someone advertises something doesn't mean you always have to buy it. Just as you shouldn't simply follow anything that's offered to you. An advertisement doesn't mean you have to buy everything. Understood?"
"Understood."
Sirius was always committed to the responses he was given.
Deyarin felt reassured as she continued walking towards the increasingly dark streets.
The house was far enough away to be on the outskirts of town, and even though there was a residential area nearby, it was isolated there.
Naturally, the place was rare, dark and quiet.
If Dearyn had been alone, she would have been afraid to even think about going down this path, but having Sirius with her made her feel safe.
Even if they encountered bandits on the way, these attackers would have been more concerned about their safety.
'Ah, but a killer might appear too. Maybe I should have been more careful.'
No, that's an exaggeration of concern.
How could the killers know about their secret exit?
There were not many assassination attempts.
“But...”
Sirius, who was quietly following Dearren, continued to ask endless questions.
When one does not know anything, one is quiet, but once one begins to learn, curiosity follows without stopping.
But Dearyn was a priestess.
All matters relating to preaching and teaching the poor required speech.
She was able to skillfully handle simple questions from Sirius.
"Yes. What else would you like to know?"
“What is love?”
"Sorry!"
…She wasn't skilled at this.
What absolute divine power.
When you try to show off a little, the ruler immediately puts you back in your position and lets you realize your true size.
Dearyn held her confused head and let out a sigh.
“No, no, it's…”
…really.
What is love?
It was difficult for her to explain something she didn't know herself.
Sirius looked at Dearen with his bright eyes, like a young child watching his teacher.
She couldn't say, "I don't know!" In front of those looks.
This was a matter of pride.
“Love is…”
Dearyn took a deep breath, trying to buy some time.
Suppose the person who asked this question was not Sirius, but children in a religious school for children.
Children innocently wondering what love means, instead of Sirius who is always attached to her and feels cared for.
“Love is the ruler’s feeling towards you. It is a warm, kind and affectionate heart.”
Oh...that was great.
Even Deyarin liked the answer she gave.
Is there an answer that could be more perfect than that?
No one can deny that this is love.
“…hmmm...”
But to Sirius's understanding, that was an abstract concept too far beyond his reach.
Sirius, who was weak at understanding abstract words, had difficulty this time as well.
All the words in Deyarin's explanation were abstract in nature.
“Caring”, “warm”, “gentle”, “affectionate”, “hearty.”
To understand one word requires understanding five other words. Where is the logic in this?
“That man said he liked women. Is that really true?”
“Um...maybe, it's an act from the heart...?”
“So, how do we love?”
"… I don't know."
Deyarin began to feel urgent hope.
She sincerely hoped that a question like, “How do you make babies?” would not arise.
Diarine was on the verge of tears.
“Why don't you know?”
Sirius was in a state of denial, unable to accept that there was something Dearren didn't know.
But you had to disappoint him in this matter.
“I haven't tried it myself!”
“Why didn't you try?”
“Can I really try it?”
“You can try anything.”
What a state of distress...
If only I could experience this kind of military love.
Dearyn was about to shout, “Love now, right away!”, but it seemed like Sirius was going to try to find a way.
“Love is not what I do consciously, but rather something I discover without knowing it.”
“……?”
“I mean, sometimes, I don't intentionally make my heart beat strongly, but rather it beats naturally.”
“Oh.”
“The same thing happens in love. Suddenly, without knowing it, I realized at some point ‘Oh, I’m in love now,’ and this is love.”
"Yes."
At this clarification, Sirius nodded clearly.
“…Do you understand a feeling? Do you understand?”
"Yes."
"… Did you understand?"
“It's like awareness of the abnormal.”
“Ah... ah...”
If we must examine this statement, it is true...
What Sirius referred to as an abnormal condition may indicate excitement, addiction, or the discovery of an injury he did not know about before...
But love is also considered an unnatural state.
"Is this correct?"
Since it is not something that can be seen, talking about it has become more complicated over time.
“So how can love be verified or distinguished?”
Dearyn's eyes ran in circles.
“Love... um...”
Since Diaren had never experienced love herself, she had to piece together as much of the expressions she heard from others as possible.
“It varies from person to person, but it seems that the person feels that his heart is beating fast when he sees the person he loves, and his face becomes red, and he feels happy when looking at him, and he wants to stay with him constantly... and that person seems to be the most beautiful in the world. It seems like this.”
When she combined all the expressions she seemed to have heard before, the recipe became rather convincing.
“Yes, if it was about love, it might be like this.”
As she was imagining, an image began to form in her mind. Something soft and comfortable, that sparkles and shines.
"Understood."
Sirius nodded confidently.
Now things are more clear.
The man who proposed shouted in much the same way.
“From the moment I first saw you, my entire world was filled with you! Now, I want to be with you forever!”
If this is love, then surely Sirius can say:
“I love Darren.”
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