Rose sighed, placing her hand on her cheek, as if she was truly filled with regret.
“Do you really think that this arrogant lady will join the book club so easily? We can’t just explicitly tell her: ‘Come,’ because this council will be a test of your eligibility to become the Crown Princess, right?”
It was natural for her to be confused.
A character like Eliade will no doubt have been taught by the best nannies, and therefore will not find a compelling reason to attend a book club.
Not to mention, her relationship with me is not good.
“We must emphasize that the club was established under the patronage of Her Majesty the Queen. Don’t you think that just mentioning this would be enough to make her come willingly?”
“That's a good idea. I'll write a great invitation that will make Eliade come running, even if she's barefoot, ha ha.”
Rose looked excited, with a confident smile on her face.
I felt reassured by her enthusiasm, so I encouraged her.
“Oh, that's great, I'm counting on you then. By the way, did you find what I asked you for?”
“Ah, I found it. Wait a minute.”
Rose looked through the folders of documents stacked on the information desk, until she found one.
“Here's a list of book loans. Why do you need them?”
I started flipping through the pages of the borrowing register, checking the names of the women who had borrowed books.
“It is the most important reference for determining the number of participants in the book club.”
“What is the criterion based on which you will choose?”
“Sort by most borrowed books.”
“Oh, excellent idea. Ladies who are really interested in books will be motivated to participate seriously in the club.”
That's how Rose is, always quick-witted.
She understood my plan at once.
“Correct answer. Also, a lot of borrowing books might mean that a girl at home doesn't have the luxury of having her own copies, right?”
“Is there a suitable lady? Tell me, I may know her.”
The name of a lady who borrowed books the most recently caught my attention.
Naturally, one can learn about a person's thoughts and values by the type of books they read.
Looking through her list of borrowings, I found books on politics and society, and others on the history of the continent.
Most of them were specialized books that only people of high culture could understand.
"Rena Douglas. What do you think of her?"
After Rose pondered the name, she thought carefully, then snapped her fingers.
“Ah, I remember her. She is the only daughter of a dissolute viscount family and lives with her mother in a small house in the capital. I heard that their financial situation deteriorated sharply after Viscount Douglas died of illness.”
I stared at her for a moment, amazed at her breadth of knowledge and amazing memory.
“How do you remember all these details?”
“I always follow the news of the nobles of Ruberia. I must know which of them is prospering and which of them is in decline. This knowledge gives me opportunities to provide them with the goods or money they need.”
Indeed, she is the eldest daughter of the most ancient merchant family in the Kingdom.
Then I suddenly had an idea that sent shivers down my spine.
“By the way...did you know the situation of the Dale family as well?”
“Yes, I knew even before you came.”
Rose answered calmly and normally.
“The library director asked me to look up your information. I think he wanted to nominate you for the position of librarian, right?”
At that moment, my head completely emptied and turned white.
When I first met William, he treated me like he was seeing me after a long absence.
He never suggested me the librarian job.
On the contrary, I was the one who took the initiative to say that I wanted to work as a librarian.
And in my empty head, seeds of doubt began to grow.
Library Director William... Why did you know everything and pretend not to know?
Why did you pretend not to know about Erica's condition, even though you knew about it?
My facial expression must have changed, because Rose looked at me worriedly.
“Erica, what’s wrong? You look pale. Haven’t you tired yourself out? You have to leave early today.”
“It's okay. It seems the effects of the alcohol haven't worn off yet. In such a situation, nothing is better than Deutsche Gukbap soup to treat a headache.”
I surprised myself that I could pretend to be calm and make a joke.
Rose did not understand my words, so she tilted her head questioningly.
“What did you say? Deutsche Gukbap? What kind of dish is this?”
“Ah, this… it’s a special stew for our family. The important thing is, Freesia promised to come in the afternoon, so I should stay here.”
“Oh, right. You told me you were going to ask Freesia to help us with the book club.”
“Yes, I will ask her to moderate the literary discussion panel. She is well versed in literature.”
Rose nodded in agreement, touching her chin.
“Friesia will certainly do a great job. But isn’t she also a candidate for the Crown Prince’s engagement?”
As the conversation moved to Freesia, Rose stopped discussing my condition.
This was comforting, as I didn't want her to appear upset.
“Yes. But… Freesia wouldn’t want that.”
Rose tapped her chin with her fingertip, lost in thought for a moment.
“Why do you think that, Erica?”
“Because she is so kind and gentle, I don’t think she will survive the harsh power struggles in the palace.”
I'm not sure if it was my imagination, but it seemed to me that a sharp gleam flickered and disappeared in Rose's brown eyes.
“Every human being has two sides. I never believe that there are good and good people all the time. There are only those who choose to be good in certain situations.”
Rose spoke sarcastically.
She was not at all like that cheerful lady who loved social life and led the fashion trends in the capital.
I was a little taken aback.
Two sides of a human being? Does the good, trustworthy William also have another side?
Rose then returned to her familiar cheerful expression and smiled faintly.
“I will collect accurate information for you about the candidates for the Crown Prince’s engagement. I will do this for you.”
"Hmm? Why for me?"
“It's just an expression. We want to see an excellent Crown Princess elected, so we can expand our family business.”
“Rose, really, staying here in the library is a waste of your talents. I think you are capable of managing the largest trade convoy on the continent.”
Rose shot me a glance.
“Flattery…more of it, please. But for now, go to your office and rest, Chief Librarian.”
***
At Rose's urging, I returned to my office.
I sat in my chair and slowly began to organize my cluttered thoughts.
Should I confront William and ask him directly? No, I'm afraid to hear his answer.
A sharp stabbing pain pressing on my head.
I leaned back in the chair and closed my eyes.
I felt as if my body was suddenly plunged into darkness.
Behind my closed eyelids, darkness spread.
Then, in this darkness, I saw two yellow eyes glowing clearly.
It's him, that monster.
[…You already know the truth.]
I've been so busy lately that I've completely forgotten about him.
I had forgotten that when I delve into my loneliness and darkness, I face it.
'Shut up, don't talk to me.'
[...You've suspected him for a long time. You were afraid that he might know that you were from another world. You felt it every time you saw his guilt-filled eyes when they looked at you.]
'Shut up.'
[Why didn't you ask him? Why do you look with those eyes? Why do you look at me as if I committed a sin against you?]
“I lost.”
I whispered the word to the monster, as if I was chewing my anger.
At that moment, a tremendous force exploded from within me, lifting my body into the air.
A powerful, unbearable force that invaded every corner of my body, from the top of my head to my heart, then from my heart to the soles of my feet, ravaging and enveloping me.
As the great wave swept away, the savage's voice disappeared without a trace.
In front of my closed retina, lights sparkled like white lightnings splitting the night sky.
I felt very dizzy, I opened my eyes and gasped.
"… Yes."
My back was sweating, and all my blood vessels were beating as if my heart was in the palm of my hand.
I tried to catch my breath to calm my troubled heart.
Control yourself, you're just overreacting.
It's just an illusion of mine. William is not like that.
His affectionate looks and warm smile when he held my hand.
He was the one who honestly said that he would be my guardian, and that he hoped that the library would be a wall that would protect me. It's not like that.
I thought again and shook my head violently, trying to steady my shaky faith.
Maybe he was just looking for my information because he was worried about me.
Don't over-explain things. I can ask him later.
Once my resolve was steady, I felt as if my jumbled mind was beginning to put itself in order.
Freesia was coming in the afternoon for an appointment.
I had to tidy up my desk and make tea to greet her before she came.
I quickly got up, and suddenly I heard a quiet knock on the door.
“Librarian Erica, are you in there?”
A calm, soft voice, so familiar.
It was Director William's voice.
I felt a wave of anxiety, but I couldn't show it.
I opened the door, pretending to be calm, and found William standing there with an affectionate smile in his eyes.
“Fortunately, you are here. Someone is looking for you, Amina. I think you two know each other.”
Behind him I saw a person hiding his face with a dark gray hood.
William stepped aside to introduce the person.
“This is the witch Valeria, the guardian of the protection. She came specifically to see your ability as a master reader for herself.”
Valeria took off her hood and stared at me with a dead face. Her eyes were calm, devoid of any emotion.
I couldn't let my guard down.
Is she hiding her true self because William is here?
I suppressed the suspicious glances that were constantly directed at William, and bowed my head in greeting.
“It has been an honor to meet you in the State Council Chamber, Madam Valeria. Please come in.”
While they were sitting on the sofa, I made tea.
I placed the kettle of water on the small stove, and as I prepared the tea leaves and cups, I had to suppress the slight trembling of my fingers.
When I first saw Valeria in the State Council chamber, she showed obvious hostility and ferocity.
It seemed as if she had discovered something important in me.
It was clear that Valeria knew that I was from another world.
The witch is a protective guardian who guards the dimensional boundaries. How much do you know exactly?
William seemed to be on friendly terms with Valeria.
He's from a monastery and a wizard as well, so naturally they'd be closely acquainted.
Did Valeria tell William my truth? Maybe he doubts me now.
Valeria, who seemed hostile and suspicious towards me, and William, who treated me without knowing about Erica's condition.
The two most suspicious people were visiting me at the same time, and I felt confused and anxious.
Knock.
My hand must have trembled, as I dropped the tea spoon with which I was transferring the leaves to the floor.
William approached and picked up the tea spoon for me.
“Erica, are you okay? You look very exhausted...”
William was staring at me with worried eyes.
“You must have been exhausted by the book club. Go sit on the sofa and rest. I’ll make some tea.”
“No, it's okay, Director. I'll bring the tea.”
door! Boom!
Suddenly, a loud and urgent knock on the door interrupted our conversation.
“Director, are you here?!”
The door opened wide, and a young man wearing a uniform bearing the emblem of the Royal Family of Ruberia rushed in.
He took a shaky breath and scanned the room.
Without caring too much about etiquette, he immediately walked towards William.
“Director, you must go to the palace immediately. There is an emergency.”
نهض ويليام واقفًا على الفور.
“Assistant James, what brings you here?”
“Your Majesty’s health has suddenly deteriorated. You must report to the palace quickly.”
Loving translation