Chapter 42: First Trial (2)
“…Rachel?”
Edwin repeated his governess's name in amazement.
Meanwhile, Rachel had rushed with her entire body next to the monster that had attacked the prince, and rolled with him on the ground. As the monster lost its balance and flung aside, she immediately pounced again. Her movement was so rapid that it prompted the question: Can a human being really move like this?
Rachel quickly plunged a dagger into the monster's smooth nape.
“Kyaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!”
But she did not cut his windpipe; Rather, it only served to arouse his anger. Contrary to its appearance, the monster's outer shell was very thick; Although she stabbed with all her might, the dagger left only a small scratch that seemed useless.
But Rachel was not confused. On the contrary, it resumed the attack. As she nimbly dodged his fangs and claws, she continued to stab at the same spot repeatedly.
Knock…knock…knock.
Until the small scratch turned into a gaping wound. Rachel's hand didn't stop. As she wrestled with the monster, she looked like another monster.
It's like I'm watching two monsters fighting.
Edwin stared, transfixed, until the battle finally ended.
“Come on!”
The monster's huge body fell to the ground with a thud.
The victory went to his nanny, Rachel.
“Ts…”
The dagger I snatched from that thief has become completely dull. It was already worn out, and now the stress was wearing it off. I threw him to the ground and turned around. Edwin stared at me in amazement. He looked even more miserable than when we first met: hair matted with dirt and twigs, hands full of scratches, and the edges of his trousers and shoes torn.
"Rachel, how...?"
Tears were still shining in his big eyes. No wonder; He has just escaped death.
“How do you think? "I ran."
“No, I mean… that's not what…”
My direct answer confused him. Most likely he was wondering how a nanny could kill a monster. But I wasn't going to give him the answer he wanted.
I can't tell him. never.
How do I tell a child that I am not the real Rachel, but rather a former leader of assassins in a past life? So I deliberately dismissed the conversation.
“Let's start with a light kick.”
"What? Aagh!”
He clutched his forehead after a painful tap, blinking in confusion as his mouth opened and closed.
“Who told you to do such a foolish thing? Using yourself as bait for a monster? I suppose your highness is capable of such?
“I…”
“No—what you did is not called bait at all. What you did was pure suicide. Why would you go to such madness? "You've forgotten everything I told you about Prince Lloyd?"
My tone became harsher and Edwin shrank.
“There is nothing more foolish in this world than a senseless death!”
Normally I might have backed off at this point, but not this time. To face a monster when he doesn't even have the power to protect himself? Lost his mind?
“Doesn’t Your Highness cherish your only life?!”
I haven't raised my voice like this in a long time. Even Edwin's eyes widened and he shrank in surprise.
“Why don't you answer? to talk! You have a mouth, don't you, Your Highness?!
Edwin gasped for a long time, then frowned, holding back tears, and said with a pinched nose: “I… I don’t understand why you’re angry.” He kept wiping his eyes with his palms as he continued: “I just... I wanted to be useful!” Everyone is getting hurt and dying because of me! I hate this! I don't want to see him again!
His trembling voice swelled to the point of wailing:
“It's all because of me! My own mistake, so I didn't want it to happen again! I wanted to be useful! But I can't be like you! I thought a lot too!”
“You thought about what? That the death of someone like me doesn't matter?
“This…”
He lowered his head instead of answering.
I looked at the round top of his head and said: “I met Leo on the way. He was crying loudly. "He said he was worried because Your Highness was in danger." I also heard what you said to him: unlike you, Leo is someone the village people need, so he must survive and flee.
“…Leo said that?”
He seemed unable to believe that someone he knew just today would worry about him.
“He saw you with his own eyes being chased by a monster. Isn't it strange that he doesn't worry?
I squatted in front of him as he stared at his feet.
“You said you don't understand why I'm angry.”
Edwin snorted and barely shook his head. I took an ointment from my pocket and spread out the palm of his right hand: blood was dripping from the palm, which had been scraped by stones.
“The reason I am angry, as I have often told you, is that you rushed in without properly estimating your opponent.”
There is a barely visible piece of paper between courage and recklessness—but it may separate life from death. Whoever walks that line must learn how to distinguish between them.
“And more than that...”
I anointed his wound. It was deep—perhaps it would leave a mark.
“...I was angry that Your Highness began to think like this.”
Edwin before me was a child before he was a prince. He has no strength to protect himself, nor insight to distinguish right from wrong, yet he begins to see himself as insignificant. There are mountains of adults in this world who deserve to die more. How does a child like this adopt this thinking? unacceptable.
“I mean: What Your Highness went through is not all your fault. Don't blame yourself.”
“But...”
“No ‘buts’, Your Highness.” I cut him off firmly. “Your only fault is your reckless rush today against the beast. Understood?"
He was about to argue, but quickly nodded under my intense gaze.
They say: Every choice has a price. But this child did not have a choice at all, and despite that, he bears the responsibility for everything.
I was too harsh on Lloyd.
At that time I was not going to take responsibility for Edwin or Emilia, so I deliberately pushed them away from me.
But things have changed now.
I took out a clean handkerchief and wrapped it around Edwin's wound.
“Heh.”
Edwin stared at his wrapped hand and whispered softly: “…I want to be strong like you.”
I stopped at his words and looked up at him. In the blue of his eyes, despair was mixed with longing.
“Do you think I can?”
“Your Highness, when we return...” I looked into the eyes of the little prince who was almost crying, and put my hand on his shoulder:
“I will appoint Your Highness to be able to choose whatever you wish.”
Edwin tilted his head in surprise: “What does this mean?”
“Meaning…” I revealed a bitter smile: “I will make Your Highness stronger than anyone.”
After the prince was miraculously rescued from the fangs of the monster, Saj saw us returning home and greeted us with a cold face:
“The important thing is that you are both alive, right?”
Even after hearing that the two boys were about to be presumed, Sag remained completely calm.
I said to him: “For whoever sent them into danger intentionally, you do not see an ounce of remorse.”
Immediately, Sag gasped: “Intentionally? Listen, I may be gay, but I'm not crazy throwing babies into monsters' mouths! I still have my mind!”
I turned to the prince: “I apologize, Your Highness. I underestimated this man's madness. Let's go. We must find another teacher.”
“Are you ignoring me now? Young people these days do not respect elders—!”
Meanwhile, Edwin turned pale as if our words had struck him as a lightning bolt:
“Don’t say… you knew about the monsters’ appearance and yet you sent me and Leo there…?”
“Oh heavens, I said it wasn't so! Even a boy who has not dried up his saliva is ignoring me now?
Sage hit his chest with his fist in anger, then straightened his face:
“Well, let's say I sent you both knowing the monsters were showing up. So what?
"What?"
“There is no trial without difficulty in this world, is there?” He narrowed his eyes at Edwin, who was much smaller than him.
“If you had taken Leo as a shield and fled, I would have grabbed you by the collar myself and thrown you into the monster’s mouth.”
Edwin hiccuped in surprise.
“Of course, if I had charged directly at the beast and died, it would have been over. I do not make fools as disciples.”
I said sharply: “Did it not occur to you that he might die while escaping?” Really, Hakim?
“I don't take unlucky people as students either. Their bad luck may spread to me.”
Rude and uncompromising.
While I was internally grinding my teeth, she turned to Edwin:
“Anyway, have you found your answer, Prince of the Little Ones?”
"What?"
“Did I not tell you to prove whether you are worthy of teaching?”
What is proven in a circumstance like this? Prove to him that “wise men” die if they are bitten by monsters?
“Your Highness,” I said, crawling in front of Edwin, “I see I have misjudged.” I stared at the frowning old man: “A person like this is not fit to be a teacher.” Let's look for—»
Then a little voice came from behind me, Edwin's voice:
“I thought about it. I still don’t understand what you meant by “anyone.”
His face was very serious.
“But if by “anyone” you mean someone who is no different from other people, then I...”
His blue eyes rose to Sage:
“I do not think I am fit to be your student, sir. I apologize."