Chapter Forty-Eight
.Chapter forty-eight.
The bells in the place rang happily.
The smell of new clothes wafted in the air.
Elegant clothes with new designs were hung, as befits the Street of Artists.
You should definitely like Max.
"What do you think? Isn't it a great place?"
She turned to Max and asked him.
But instead of exploring the store, he looked at me in fascination.
“Yes, it's really great. Excellent.”
I was so embarrassed that I turned my head and muttered.
“What is this? You can’t say ‘yes’ just looking at my face, you have to look at the store.”
Max complained: “That's not fair... I didn't just look at your face... I checked the store too.”
I narrowed my eyes in doubt and said, “So what animal was on the tapestry on the table?”
“Lion,” Max said with a calm face.
She suddenly laughed and replied in amazement: “Don’t lie with that polite face, lion!!! Look, it’s an oriental dragon, it’s an imaginary animal.”
Hearing these words, Max looked at the table, looked at the huge blue dragon embroidered on it, frowned again, and then said cheekily: “Excuse me, I think I got confused for a moment.”
But I smiled and shook my head: “I won’t deceive anymore… It turns out that you are used to lying.”
Max touched his chin: “That's sad... Carmilla already exposed me... Wasn't that too quick to understand?”
She realized Max was joking and laughed softly, as expected.
“I don't really need to tell you that I'm smart, do I?”
At the end of those words, Max and I looked at each other and laughed out loud.
Why is it so relaxing and entertaining? It was as if I had become a child again without any worries.
I was strange... I had never felt this feeling before, even in my first meeting with Bernard.
What happened with Bernard was a series of things that made me feel hurt and disappointed.
But I didn't feel that way with this person.
She turned to Max and our eyes met.
“What, were you staring at me again?”
“I can't take my eyes off you because you look like roses.”
“Yes…yes?”
“Look, you're still blushing... How are you blushing so quickly?”
"What are you saying!"
I could tell from the way we looked at each other that we were enjoying this time comfortably.
We laugh naturally.
It was really weird that just looking at each other was fun.
The world was a little brighter… I could even feel the wind gently touching my skin.
I want to live forever in that moment.
However, it was strange that time passed so quickly.
The sun had already risen high and was about to set, but I had no idea when time had reached this point.
Happy times pass quickly.
After looking at the clothes, listening to my favorite poet, and enjoying the reflection of the rainbow on the water droplets near the fountain, a faint red color began to appear in the sky.
“The day is coming to an end,” she muttered sadly.
Seeing my frustration, Max suggested to me: “I agree... Should we stop somewhere for the last time?”
I thought for a moment... Then I clapped my hands and raised my head: “Ah! There is a place I want to go.”
And so we arrived at the Poor Painters' Gallery, which I love to visit.
Max looked uncomfortable when he arrived at the gallery because he was dragged to it without any explanation.
He looked around slowly.
I thought, 'Well, what would he think of the place he loved the most?'.
Finally, Max, who was looking at a painting with appreciation, said: “It's refreshing... The drawing is rough, but realistic... A little clumsy, but I feel the spirit of boldness in the painting... There is no hesitation in the lines drawn.”
Max showed interest as he moved a few steps: “The level of detail is imprecise, but the colors and composition are bold... There is nothing bad about it... It gives me a strong impression... I have seen many paintings more elaborate than these, but I love them.”
For some reason, it felt good...but he didn't have to like the same painting as me.
Taking a relaxed step, I presented the plates to him one by one, just as Max had once done.
“This is a painting by Andrea... She has been underrated because she is an artist, but I really like her paintings... They are harsh and brutal... The dark sky is crying, the thick paint is swirling violently around her and the woman is dressed in black like a corpse with a red river behind her... She expresses her personal imagination regardless of reality..”
There I said as if I was talking to myself: "I loved this painting very much. When I am in a bad mood and want to scream, I feel comforted when I look at it. It seems that it screams for me in difficult moments... which makes it a little easier to bear."
How comfortable did he make me feel? I wasn't used to expressing my feelings.
My heart would stay pent up and when things were really tough, I would feel comforted when I looked at this painting.
It was a source of comfort... All those days when I needed someone to feel me, I looked at this painting.
At that time, Max looked at my face in silence.
As he looked at the painting for a long time, he seemed to think about the past.
I felt a little embarrassed and called his name.
“Max?”
“I loved this painting because it comforted you in the past. Is your life happier now?”
I was nervous for a moment, but then I said calmly, “Yes, now my life seems happier.”
“By the way, if you liked this painting, why didn’t you buy it?”
He looked around and said, “I don’t think it was expensive for you.”
She smiled: “Because I am not the only one suffering in the world...”
I always felt secretly comfortable with her...so I am indebted to these painters.
“There are so many people suffering in these streets... I don't know about Andrea's other paintings, but I wanted to hang this one here... So, after I bought it, I paid the exhibition fee and displayed it here.”
My eyes were suddenly filling with tears. No, I thought about the past a lot.
I was still sad and upset about the past.
I forgot that if I thought about it, I would burst into tears.
Although I tried to stop the tears, they continued to fall to no avail.
At those words, she smiled bitterly inside.
'no. I'm not good. … …’.
I know this is not the right thing to do.
If I don't take revenge, my heart will get sick and I won't be able to be saved.
“I had no hesitation but I wouldn't say I was good or right either...it might be the remnants of my conscience.
So, I gritted my teeth, endured the feelings inside me, and barely responded to Max’s words: “Okay.”
I couldn't confirm it, and I couldn't deny it.
If I deny it, he will point out the reasons why I am no good. In fact, he just doesn't know.
I'm deceiving him.
I kept my mouth shut and bore with a pale face.
He gently touched my hair and hugged my body gently.
I froze in shock and hesitated as to whether I should push him away, but his embrace was so warm and his scent made me feel good, so I leaned into his embrace without pushing him away or hugging him.
“Everyone who hurts you will pay the price, so don’t cry.”
“I'm not crying...”
As I tried to tell him I wasn't crying, my voice became shaky and tears came to my eyes.
Even though I thought I cried a lot in front of him, I couldn't stop crying.
“This is because of you……. Because you are so kind… I can’t help but cry… There is not a single one…….”
Then he laughed gently.
He makes me cry all the time, but not like Bernard, he's sweet and gentle.
Can I expect more? Can I be weak in front of him?.
I thought about it, but I wanted it so bad I couldn't resist it.
Maybe I will regret that moment one day, but now I want to be with him so I buried my head deep in his lap.
Max hugged me tighter.
Pray.
For our people.
In Gaza with victory and bloodshed.
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Enjoyable reading.