Cesare never lied to Eileen. Instead of telling lies, he preferred silence. He was always sincere with her, and this situation was no different. He meant every word he said. If Eileen promised, he would reveal everything she wanted to know.
But Eileen couldn't make such a promise. The request shook her deeply.
Her mother had always taught her that their lives belonged to the Prince. Even her mother's last words had been in the Prince's name.
“My dearest Lily ,” — the mother whispered with parched lips, her face pale with illness.
"Long live the Prince!"
The woman's eyes gleamed with a complex mixture of jealousy, anger, and love, leaving an indelible mark on Eileen's heart—a sort of curse.
Still, Eileen had accepted that curse willingly. Even without her mother's words, she would have lived for the Prince.
Therefore, he could not lie to Caesar by promising not to die for him.
When she didn't answer, Cesare's smile widened slightly. A distorted smile tugged at his lips, as if he had known from the beginning that she would be unable to comply.
Seeing that smile awakened something in Eileen. Before she could fully process her emotions, the words spilled from her lips.
So you too.
It was a visceral impulse—the same one she felt when she saw her unscarred hand and wondered how she knew about the wedding ring described in her diary. That intuition took over again, leading her to speak slowly and deliberately.
Promise me you won't die for me.
The sheer absurdity of the request struck her the moment the words were spoken. Cesare giving his life for her? The mere idea seemed laughable. He would probably find it ridiculous too.
It was more likely that the sky would fall than that he would make such a promise. Still, Eileen couldn't contain herself. She didn't quite understand why, but she needed to hear the answer. She wanted the man to promise life, not death.
If you do that, then I promise too.
When she finished speaking, a heavy silence fell between them. Eileen looked away, unable to continue staring at Cesare. The fear of his reaction to her foolish words made her heart race. She hoped he wouldn't ridicule her too much.
She waited anxiously for his reply, until she heard a laugh. Hesitantly, she raised her head and saw Cesare smiling. At first glance, it seemed a genuine laugh, but there was a coldness to it that made Eileen shrink even further.
"This is problematic, " he said, his eyes narrowing with a smile. And then he murmured to himself, "I've already broken that promise..."
Eileen couldn't quite understand what he meant. She wanted to ask if she had misheard, but the words wouldn't come out.
Cesare pulled the chair closer, trapping Eileen between his legs. Without asking permission, he took her hand. Though his movements were firm, the way he held it was surprisingly gentle. As if merely touching her wasn't enough, Cesare slowly began to remove his leather gloves.
Their skin touched, and with just the contact of their hands, a tingling sensation ran deep through Eileen's inner walls. She became intensely aware of Cesare's muscular thighs enveloping her.
Her gaze wandered, unfocused. Although they had been married for some time, they had only been intimate twice. Since then, Cesare had been so busy that even sharing a bed had become rare. Usually, Eileen would fall asleep before he arrived in the room, and when she woke up, he was already gone.
Eileen swallowed hard. While she trembled with tension, Cesare remained calm, his eyes lowered as he gently traced his fingers over hers.
He stroked the tips of her nails and then slowly intertwined their fingers, his grip firm and comforting.
The simple gesture of holding hands, intensified by her heightened sensitivity, seemed unexpectedly intimate.
After a moment, Cesare gently pulled his hand away.
Ah!
Eileen sighed as her body leaned forward, and in the next instant, their lips met. It was as if they had made a silent promise from the beginning to kiss.
He slid his tongue between her parted lips, squeezing her intertwined hands tightly enough to cause pain. The slight pain only intensified the tingling that spread through her body, making her shudder.
With one hand still intertwined with hers, Cesare's other hand slid down her back. His long fingers traced her spine, and Eileen let out a soft moan each time they passed.
— Hm…
The small sound that escaped her lips was immediately swallowed when Cesare pressed his mouth against hers again. His tongue explored her mouth, provoking a strange, ticklish sensation in her vagina.
He dominated the kiss, stealing her breath. Dizzy from lack of air, Eileen squeezed her eyes shut, then opened them again. As soon as their lips parted briefly, they collided once more, continuing the passionate kiss.
The kiss completely overwhelmed her, clouding her thoughts and making her head spin with lust. Amidst the torrent of sensations, a sudden thought pierced her confusion.
'In the end... he won't tell me anything.'
Would it be like this again? Even without meeting Cesare's expectations, Eileen couldn't let herself be completely carried away. With the hand he wasn't holding, she gently pushed his chest and tried to undo their intertwined fingers, signaling that she needed to stop and talk.
However, Cesare seemed to interpret her gesture differently. He didn't give in, holding her firmly. When their lips parted briefly, Eileen managed to call his name.
Cesare…
But he didn't answer. There was no room for words between them; Eileen was completely consumed by the intensity of the kiss, unable to express her thoughts.
When the kiss finally ended, Eileen looked at Cesare, her eyes reflecting everything she couldn't say. Cesare lightly ran his fingers over her moist lips and spoke softly:
It's okay if you only know a little.
In the past, when she was still just his child, perhaps that would have been acceptable. But now Eileen had changed; she wanted more. When she shook her head in denial, Cesare's gaze became intense, probing, as if searching for a new understanding within her.
"What is it that you so desperately want to know? " he asked, curiosity in his voice. "When you can't even make a promise."
Feeling unfairly judged, Eileen responded immediately, keeping her voice steady despite her emotion.
— But you, Cesare… you can't keep a promise either.
So I can't do it?
- Yes …
Cesare let out a short, humorless laugh. His expression, once slightly smiling, was now blank. The sudden change in his posture made Eileen freeze, seized by a belated realization of her own audacity.
- I'm sorry.
Even after immediately apologizing, Cesare remained silent, his gaze fixed on her. The silence, though brief, seemed endless to Eileen. Unable to bear it, she nervously bit her lip.
I just…
As his voice wavered, Cesare covered his eyes with his hand. After a moment, he stood up and walked to the window, gazing at the forest before returning to it.
Eileen remained motionless, feeling as if the tension had frozen her in place.
Cesare then looked down at her and opened his arms. His previously intense gaze softened. Eileen, relieved, stood up and hugged him.
"I didn't mean to scare you." As he embraced her, his voice sounded almost reflective. "It's difficult. I thought you were more obedient when you were younger."
Eileen wanted to reply that things were different now that she was an adult, but prudently kept it to herself. Instead, she answered in a low voice:
I wasn't scared.
In truth, she wasn't afraid of Cesare; what frightened her at that moment was the possibility that his affection for her had diminished.
Their relationship had always been defined by a clear power hierarchy. Everything required his permission. Hidden truths, affection… Eileen had nothing she could claim as truly her own.
Overcome with emotion, Eileen stood on tiptoe and pressed her lips to the corner of Cesare's mouth. She intended to kiss him, but the trembling caused her to miss slightly. The man's eyes narrowed in response.
Seeing his reaction, Eileen gently kissed his lips. Until then, Cesare had allowed her to act according to her own will.
Although she couldn't claim his affection, she could still express it. Within the limits that Cesare allowed, Eileen sought to convey her feelings.
Please... hug me.
To be continued…